Ramblings the night before one of the biggest days of our lives...

Hey there everyone...sorry I went off rader the past couple of days. I've had a hard time putting everything into words lately, and I've kind of crawled into a hole. Sunday was a very hard day for me, I just couldn't get myself to feel positive that morning. Thankfully, church was a huge blessing and then we went for pizza with hubby's family. We had a really nice time, and when my niece said, "I go to your house, Auntie?", who was I to say no?

So the little beauty came to our house and took a nice long nap....when she got up, I carried her out and hubby looks at her and says in the sweetest voice, "There's my girl!". Talk about melting my heart, hubs. Like I'm not emotional enough.

We sat down on the couch together and the sweet niece had a snack, then played with toys for a while in the other room while we started a move. After playing with toys, she came out of the room with "her" doll and climbed up in Uncle's lap. It was the most precious thing to sit there on the couch, just the three of us, enjoying time together and watching a movie. I happened to catch the most precious smile on our little niece's face as she soaked up all the love we have for her:





I took her home later and our house was suddenly strangely quiet again. But I somehow felt better and more peaceful. I'm pretty sure it was all of the many prayers being offered on my behalf...God really quieted my heart.

Monday was a BUSY day that hardly left time for thinking about the fact that my beta was drawing closer. I decided NOT to test and was glad for that since I was so busy with work. After having a week off for the transfer, I had a LOT of catching up to do.

Then we get to today...I sincerely thought about testing, but didn't. I'm glad, because I was distracted enough as it was. I couldn't focus on work, but I had a ton to do. I did everything I could, allowed myself some YUMMY C.hipotle for lunch and then finished up work in time to meet a dear friend for coffee. And I am SO glad I was able to meet with her.

R. encouraged me in a way that I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that her words were straight from God. She was such an incredible blessing to me, and I neededto hear what she had to say tonight.

Because of her words of encouragement and assurance, I feel more calm tonight than I thought possible. She reminded me that I have surrendered this baby to God...time and again. And every time I start to feel fearful, worried or nervous, I can once again trust this baby to our amazing God and know that He has everything under control. No matter what happens, we will be okay. Somehow, God will help us through it and will heal us. And no matter the outcome, He will take care of us and our precious babe, just like He is caring for the two we have already lost. I can trust my Father.

And yet, I will continue to ask throughout tonight and tomorrow morning that this babe is still here, growing and thriving in my womb. And I would love if you would join me in prayer when you read this.

Just to finish of this post on a lighter note (because it is GOOD to laugh), here are a couple of quotes from the weekend:

From a nephew upon seeing a bunch of pink flamingos in a front yard:
"Are those Mingos?"

"No, they are FLAmingos. They start with a "f" sound".

"Oh"...long pause..."Are those where mangoes come from?" :)

From my niece when staying at our house and wanting more to drink:

"Uncle (insert name here)...I need more drink."

"What's the magic word?"

"I drink it all gone!!" :)

And the final crack up of the weekend, from my hubs after giving me a hug from behind and patting my belly:

"Woops, is that like tapping on the glass at the zoo?" Nice one, babe. :)

And that's all for now...blood test in T-11 hours. Thank you, God, for the chance to give this little one a life.